You are not going to believe this.  Yesterday I went into a department store and proceeded to the floor that had cosmetics.  Yes, siree.

You are probably asking yourself, what in the heck was Neil doing in the cosmetics section of a department store, especially in Paris.

First, let me say, I do not believe that I have ever, ever been on the cosmetics floor of a department store.

Second, a clue to the answer to your question is that I had my daughter and her friend Caroline with me.  Or, more accurately, they had me with them.

Kelsey and Caroline wanted to go to the cosmetics floor of La Samaritaine – “the temple of Parisian lifestyle” — a very upscale department store in Paris.  The reason being that they had heard that they had some kind of a machine that looked at your face and could tell from it what was underneath your outer skin.  From that they could recommend what kinds of lotions and other products would be most helpful to keep your facial skin in top condition.

Needless to say, as a good father, what was I to say, but let’s go see.

My first impression was oh my goodness. I have never seen so many cosmetic products in my life.  I have never seen so many mirrors in my life, and I have never seen so many clerks and attendants that had facial skin that looked soooooo good.  Wow!

Nevertheless, I tried not to show my reactions. I tried to act like I peruse cosmetic departments all the time.  I tried not to stand out.  Good luck!

We found Naima, who it turns out is not only a salesperson but also a registered pharmacist.  She immediately connected with Kelsey and Caroline.  They were obviously speaking the same language about cosmetics, skin care and lotion.

Naima introduced us to this machine – which I don’t know the name of – which can look beneath your facial skin to determine whether there are some dark spots that need attention or whether there is a dryness that needs to be moistened and hydrated, to name a few.

Kelsey went first and placed her head inside a dark black hood that looked a lot like the hood that cameramen would use when shooting movie scenes in the old days.  Once situated, Naima took her position and peered into the machine from the opposite side.  She communicated to Kelsey what she was seeing.  Before long they both stepped away from the machine, nodding their heads in agreement about the diagnosis, and they quickly moved from one counter to another, discussing along the way which products were the best for Kelsey’s issues.

Next was Caroline. A similar process ensued.  Before you knew it, she and Naima are perusing products for Caroline’s unique facial needs.

Then, all three of them looked at me.  and I said “what?”  “Your turn” says Kelsey.  I said, “oh, no.  not me.”  “Come on,” said Kelsey and Caroline in unison.  “What if the guys here about this?” I said.  “I have an image to defend.”

Finally, I said OK, but on one condition — no pictures.  No pictures!

The girls readily agreed.  I put my head inside the black box looking machine, and Naima gave me some instructions on where to move, how high to put my chin and where to look. Naima gets on the other side of the machine and starts to tell me what she is seeing.  And then she asks me…

Have you ever used skin cream or lotion?  Do you use sunscreen daily?  Of course, my answer is no and no.

I pull my head out of the machine and Naima looks at me.  It was a long stare.  It was apparent to me that she was thinking about how to phrase something that she wanted to tell me.

Finally, in a very calm and measured tone, Naima says to me that my skin needs to be moistened and hydrated.

I say to myself, what the heck does that mean.  Well, she and the girls jump up and immediately walk over to one of the displays and start talking among themselves about what products I need.

They come back with two.

• One is a Skin Ceuticals product called Silymarin CF. It claims to be a high potency combination antioxidant with silymarin, 15% L-ascorbic acid, and 0.5% ferulic acid.
• The other is also a Skin Ceuticals product but called A.G.E. Interrupter Advanced, which according to its box is a concentrated multi-corrective treatment which improves accelerated signs of aging impacted by advanced glycation end-products.

I don’t argue because I know it would be futile with my daughter, her friend and Naima all joining forces.

I have since done a little research on lotions and creams.

• Lotions are moisturizers — a mix of water and droplets of oil, with a higher water content than creams. They are not greasy.  Lotions are more readily absorbed by our skin than cream products.
• Creams on the other hand have a higher concentration of oil (50-50) and as a result are thicker in consistency and greasier. Creams provide a barrier that keeps the skin ultra-hydrated.  Creams have a purpose — to treat and prevent dry, cracked skin.

The goal is to keep the skin supple and moisturized.

In the process of doing my research I came across three words that were new to me.

• one, being occlusive. Cream is more occlusive than lotion.  It locks, blocks and obstructs the moisture in the skin from escaping.
• An anagram that I have learned is TEWL, which stands for trans epidermal water-loss. It is the measurement that tracks the amount of water that escapes from your skin.
• Another new word for me is comedogenic. Comedogenic ingredients are ones that clog your pores.  You want to make sure that the products you are using do not contain any of these comedogenic ingredients like stearic acid, lanolin, allantoin, dimethicone, and isopropyl palmitate to name a few.

Let me get back to the cosmetics floor at La Samaritaine department store.  At some point I go to pay for these tiny boxes of facial lotions and creams, and I was shocked at the prices.  I mean shocked. I am not going to disclose what the costs were, but let’s just say that these little bottles and jars are not cheap.

When we get back to our apartment in Paris, I ask Kelsey for some help in how to use and apply these two items that I just purchased.

Rather than write the story out, I am going to show you some pictures that capture the process of applying the lotion and cream.

Egad.  And I am supposed to do this two times a day.

This story has several points.

• One, it is OK for each of us to experience something that we are not naturally comfortable with. Each of us can learn from others.
• Two, NEVER believe your daughter when she promises not to take any pictures.
• Three, do NOT step foot on a cosmetics floor in a department store.
• And a fourth lesson from this story is NEVER go shopping with your daughter.